It already has lost its hold. It is strange, there is a freedom now as I head there...as long as Chris was there, I was firmly tied to my future there. Now, with him gone, poof goes that loyalty.

I guess I am grateful for those happy years there...good times were had, and I got to experience that kind of job that feels like family. I want that again, but know it isn't anything that happens easily.

If I decide to just go ahead and stay there for a couple more years, which is a good possibility, as I wait for my two to get themselves established (esp. the youngest), I know I can deal with it. I think also I should use that time a bit more wisely--go back to school? Or serious writing. You know what I prefer between the two!