Yes, there is that shiny thing. I should, no, shall try to post more. It really helps and I feel so much love from you and the others who commented. What set me off, weirdly enough, was listening to old music that I hadn't in awhile, that I associate (or at least my stupid brain does) with very happy things, things that are over, or changed, or whatever. I seriously had to turn off my itunes and watch a show - lol picked SPartacus. OH MY. *blink blink*
And yes - it is hard to get out. I am SO DETERMINED to go to this drumming circle thing next Saturday but it will be so HARD to get myself to go. I know no one - no wait, one lady, and the guy who invited me though I have yet to meet them in person. I want to do something for the sheer joy of noise and sharing.
I hate the lonelies. So much. Am fine during the day but it is at night that it really sucks. Having Nick here, very briefly, made it worse - it just feels so good to have someone there to do things with, you know?
I need a roommate. LOL After my son leaves, I am going to have to try to find someone, I think. Maybe. RISK! EEEK!
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And yes - it is hard to get out. I am SO DETERMINED to go to this drumming circle thing next Saturday but it will be so HARD to get myself to go. I know no one - no wait, one lady, and the guy who invited me though I have yet to meet them in person. I want to do something for the sheer joy of noise and sharing.
I hate the lonelies. So much. Am fine during the day but it is at night that it really sucks. Having Nick here, very briefly, made it worse - it just feels so good to have someone there to do things with, you know?
I need a roommate. LOL After my son leaves, I am going to have to try to find someone, I think. Maybe. RISK! EEEK!