On living alone, and being alone

[paragraphs]

Somedays, I really hate it.

Am still trying to learn to do this, and it just isn't easy sometimes. Even with the dogs, it isn't easy. Even on Wellbutrin, it isn't easy. It's lonely as hell at times. My favorite companion lives in another country. I miss my kids living here but I kept them as long as I could - they had to leave eventually. I miss my mom. I keep hearing 'this is it, kid, this is your life, get used to it' but I don't really like that voice in my head very much.

I can see why some people have lots of pets, or go out and spend a lot of money they don't need to be spending, or eat when they shouldn't because at least it gets your mind off being alone in a house and no one thinking about you.

Yes, I am having THAT kind of day, where taking a nice long nap seems more attractive than anything.

I have great friends, I have great family, I have a fantastic job I enjoy, I do things a couple of times a week, but sometimes? Just not enough.

Generally I love my house to myself, and my solo time - time that when I was married way back when, would kill for. But sometimes having something in abundance is just too much.

I'll get over this mood, I always do. But in the meantime, it just really sucks.

Comments

[stargazer60.livejournal.com]

I always remind myself that there is a difference between being alone and being lonely.

But I know EXACTLY where you are coming from. I have days like this too...

*HUGS*

[sartorias.livejournal.com]

Hey, it's whole new stuff, no habits yet. I bet you'll work it out so you love it.

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

I am so, so, SO SMITTEN with Lhind!!!!! Lhind just had a bath... first bath... so you know where I am.

More later, but I am simply adoring this story. Lhind is such a fascinating, amusing, bratty, intelligent and mysterious character and I love the world she lives in. World. (he! I think of Lhind as both, and I am curious about a comment Lhind made... must read more...).

Just wanted you to know how much I am enjoying Lhind. :)

[sartorias.livejournal.com]

Oh, I am so glad! That makes me feel so happy!

[paragraphs.livejournal.com]

I am glad! :) I read a bit at lunch and am going to go curl up for more. Srsly though, I am just inhaling how you write Lhind as a character, and how so alive she is. And complicated, and yes a lot happens to Lhind but Lhind makes things happen too.

[sartorias.livejournal.com]

:-) Thanks!

[used_songs]

I'm sorry. I wish you lived in SA, and I could drop by and take you out for coffee.

[jealousofstars.livejournal.com]

*squishy panda hugs*

I'm sorry, C. These moods suck.

I know it's not the same, but I'm always here for you. And we can Skype or do a Google Hangout or whatever.

[humming-along.livejournal.com]

Move close to some extremely dear friends. The house next to mine will be for sale sometime in the next few months.

[pir8fancier.livejournal.com]

People need companion ship. Plain and simple. We are tribal. We need tribes. You don't have to apologize because at times you find yourself without your tribe.

[catsintheattic.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

[theemdash]

I very much sympathize. I'm not alone these days, but I think that if I had followed through on my plan to live alone, that I would be very lonely. *hugs* As long as you know the feeling is temporary, I hope you can muddle through. We'll all be here when you need someone to talk to.