I Am a Total Cheat

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Well, it happens...I had a post all written and I messed up something somehow and POOF it went away, whole thing. Never, ever walk away without saving. 

What I said was basically the following:

I am a cheat!  How so? I am a Nano cheat, is what I actually mean.  Nano starts officially Sunday, but having decided that I don't want my right arm to fall off, I'm shooting for 25-30k words. Roughly 1000 a day. I can handle that without waking up in the grips of agony as I did the other night (and which finally made me realize that my right arm hurt so bad because I had become addicted to Farmville and was going mad to make enough gold coins to buy a barn, and keep the cows I'm cowsitting happy).  I woke up with claw-hand, terrible stabbing aches, so bad I got tears in my eyes.  I've had severe, debilitating carpal tunnel before, and I Do Not Want It Again and I was well on my way.  So, taking it easier now on my wee farm...but I enjoy it, making gold coins and buying cute little things, so am not quitting.  LOL.  

I've also already started my story which has 40k and a rough synopsis already and that of course is against the nanowrimo rules. Whatever.  I don't care about 'winning' Nano, I care about writing every day, and getting myself out to meet other people.  This last part will be tough for me as it goes against my nature, though plenty of events are in place to go to. I've gotten possibly too used to my happy place online (mah TW peeps), and meeting people outside of my happy bubble is hard for me, but from a quick check of the blogs of those planning to show up and write at the places I am interested in, they all lean the right direction interest-wise and view-wise, so I can knock some worries off.  That is good. My entire public life here is not the real me, and it is tiring at times...if I am to make new friends, ANY friends here, I want to be totally out as the real me. If they don't like it, screw it.  It is a pretty sad truth that I know next to no-one in my hometown, and the primary reason is because of my own lack of trust in people so I stay very guarded. Hard to get to know someone truly guarded, beyond superficially. I do great superficial, so great that people think they know me...not so.  

I am tired of living like this.

As far as scheduling when to write other than during my lunch hour, looks like I've got some good peeps planning to show up at B&N. I'm going to be there Sunday morning when it opens to snag a table--possibly Saturday too. Probably. Next Friday, a group is meeting at the IHop over on Bryant-Irvin at 8 p.m. to write the night away. I shall be insane, and do that too. WTH.  I want pancakes.

Mondays and Wednesdays are Flying Saucer nights.  There is every reason to believe THAT group will be fun...not sure how much writing one can get done at a bar, but hey, I love the place, the food is good, and they have lots of beer to choose from. I might even have one. LOL. (Not much of a drinker, but Nick liked it there and we tried quite a few of the beers and ales and I found a few I liked).  This is the Flying Saucer. It is way cool inside. Wonder if they have internet? (Although that defeats the purpose, right? Maybe it picks it up from B&N next door).  The Fort Worth Flying Saucer is without doubt the coolest--it is in one of the oldest buildings in Fort Worth. (Old for Texas, my dear Europeans...) and is the original Flying Saucer. 

Obviously, I must go and try write with beer in hand.  This could be...interesting.  I must hit the treadmill regularly so as not to gain weight--Nano could be dangerous!

I think I have about everyone added to my online group but valancy_joy but I will remedy that shortly. Anyone else? Holler! Find me! cparagraphs is me!

This should be good, and quite the adventure.  And hey, I may just get that draft of my fic finished. It sure would be nice to send that puppy into my erstwhile editor before the end of the year!  I already know which character's story I want to do next. Yes, true--can't seem to help it, he smacked me in the face the other day. Sigh. 

I'm just happy, and very relieved, to be so focused for the first time in years. I finally feel a real desire to write again, I love my story, I'm excited to write it, finish it, go through all the fun of preparing it for publication, etc. It'll be really fun and interesting to see how a spinoff to Red does, and if it increases sells for that book too.  I hope so!

And of course my reel_torchwood fic is coming along...The Gulls. Starting to get into the meat of the story, and am excited. Ianto's about to be attacked by an evil seagull! Whee! Can't wait to write that. Poor guy.

Work is much better too, and that helps. I am so extraordinarily happy with my new projects I was quiet all day, happily bubbling away with my road crossings and utilities research, Cody IM'd me, concerned. Asked me if I was okay, if anything was wrong.  Love it.  I swear he is my sanity there.  

Night now--hope everyone is well, hanging in there. I'm trying my best to, myself.

C, trying to make things better here