paragraphs: Come Travel with Me (Come Travel With Me)
2013-08-21 10:03 pm

A strange reluctance...

So once again a month has passed without my writing a post, even though I have thought about doing so dozens of times. I am not sure where this reluctance to share my life seeps from...but it is there, and real, and I have become so selfish about my personal experiences, wanting to keep all of it to myself that even when I start to share I stop and think nah, no reason to share all that. Still, I do love jotting things down, as it gives me a kick now and then to look at the early months of this lj or my old lj I shared with Nick (twisting_path) and well, just reminiscing about all the fun in the past.

The last month has been full of wondrous and amazing events, as well as some sad and frustrating ones. The good - sharing an experience with someone special we'd both been looking forward to for years and years... Done now! And I am so glad to have been a part of that. Meant so much. The bad - watching some friendships explode and disintegrate (my old crit group), though in the end, I believe where the cards have fallen is a good thing. I adore my Team Awesome, and believe we're all in a good place now. I certainly feel a lot less EEEK now, and have lost the feeling I'd had of not belonging. Friendships lost, but friendships strengthened, and I am glad of that.

So cryptic, Cee!

Not much else going on - my daughter and son are doing well, about to start into school again - Tiff called me today and we talked a good half hour during my lunch about how happy she is now in Orlando. She loves what she is studying, she loves her new Starbucks she has moved to, she loves her roomies (in a house and there is a dog, a darling Golden I got to meet last month), and life is just so HAPPY for her. She likes Orlando now that she is settled there, and knowing she can fly home cheaply and easily helps. Thank goodness for cheapo airfare to Orlando!

Work is going very well - I love working for my boss, love my little firm, I feel in control and settled and I just buzz happily away all day, every day. There is a lot of stress but for some reason I am handling it better than I did. Living alone is kinda weird but kinda nice too... I get home from work, feed the dogs, play with the dogs, cuddle the dogs. Maddox has become like glue on me during the evenings. I spend a lot of time with him curled up with me. Weekends are relaxing - I try to meet Suz at least once a week on weekends to write, and oh I have my Gingerman writing group - we meet Monday nights at The Gingerman, a cute little bar near my work. Am getting to know that crew better and better and just really adore them all. Plus, it is a huggy group. I like hugs. :)

I need to get a dog door put in but this will also entail a massive overhaul of the fence (i.e., electrifying it!) because Maddox is an escape artist and we very nearly lost him a few weeks ago while I was gone, but my neighbor saved him. Whew! He pulls planks off and wiggles through. So frustrating that I can't trust him in his own backyard. :(

Writing...have to say I was and am disappointed with how my last book has done. I have several ideas of why that is so, what contributed to it not doing well (while my other books DO continue to sell well), but such is the way of things, right? Not going to stress over it, it is what it is and hey what I have received in royalties definitely paid a bill that needed paying so that is good.

I've been working on my sci fi, expanding it - about ten scenes to go on that - and am falling hard for the brilliance of Scrivener as it is helping me sort out my fantasy mess, which I have needed to for about oh a decade, I suppose? More later on that, and on writing in general (I say that and then another month will go by, oops). The happy is I found, buried deep in my email, the outline I'd written ages and ages and I do mean more than 9 years ago for this fantasy story, and rereading it now, I can see clearly what will work and what needs to be changed. All in all though? I think it will be a go. It always makes me so happy to visit with these characters! I miss them!

All for now. It is bedtime - haven't been sleeping well since the weekend because dork me burned the roof of my mouth on too-hot pizza. The burns were pretty much agony - last night I finally was able to tolerate warm food. Horrifically painful. :(

This ended up longer than I thought. I do ramble!
paragraphs: Come Travel with Me (Default)
2010-12-17 07:42 pm

Friday Night at Last... And I Hate Censorship

So, work kinda sucked in a weird way today. It was review day and I got mine--partially. To be finished on Monday, after Doran, the boss boss (he who fired my boss, Cody, Jeremy, yeah him--and is usually in Topeka) discusses with Human Resources our discussion today. Apparently, it is a no no to have Netflix mailed to work, now it is suddenly (and not just for me) a no no to watch movies (or listen to them) at work (audiobooks are fine), and also, I am In Trouble for using the copier to print off a slew of flyers for my daughter's internship, Samaritan House. Now the funny thing is I was told if I had asked If I could run them off, then it would've been fine, that B&W does this kind of thing all the time. And it is of course okay to run 10-20 copies here and there, everyone does it, but I apparently have been accused of running off 1500. Uhhh... what? I do believe after he heard what it was for--and admitted that Deb, up in Topeka, had told me it was okay--that there will be no big consequence. If there is, well, whatever.

It was an interesting discussion to say the least. Chris, my former boss, has been concerned that I would get smacked down for something inane because they know now that I talk to him all the time, and I was always happy working for Chris. [I've been kind of expecting something but I figured it would be for talking on the cell phone (mostly to Nick lol), or being on the 'nets (which I have to for what I do and generally DO stay off of twitter and lj during work--generally), or having googlemail open all the time. The only person I chat with at all anymore is Nick, and that is just here and there--chat warps my brain, I decided, and interfered with everything I wanted to get done. I am much happier without chatting, very true on that.]

But no, it was none of those things, it was stupid netflix, my laptop, and running copies. After the conversation Doran expressed concern I'd be upset, not want to go to the Christmas party tomorrow, etc. I said no, of course not. I'm cool. LOL. And I am, really. This is all so stupid, and I don't trust him, and I am quite good at playing the game, have been for weeks now.

LOL just talked to Chris-ex-boss. He believes that more than anything, Doran is testing how I react to his calling me on the carpet. I agree, actually, based on what I know about him. Stay tuned for Monday and I'll report what actually ended up happening.

In the meantime, tomorrow night is our Christmas Party, and I am bringing my daughter. Told Doran my daughter was my date (and is 21) and he would get to meet her then, oh boy! LOL. And oh no, I am absolutely never saying a word of this to Tiff. She would be very upset that her project got me a 'corrective action.' Oy!

So anyway, the above is why I have suddenly flocked my lj. I am not sure if my work computer doesn't have some link buried in it somewhere, and you never know. I won't get on lj at work again if I can help it. Okay maybe a little but I will keep logged out when not on there AND delete all my passwords. That's a good idea...first thing Monday. I already deleted Dropbox off there--would not be good if they could access my writing especially with all that gay stuff... (oy!)

And now I must get to work on my rewrite. I can just imagine what my employer would think if they knew I wrote that wicked stuff, oh lordy! LOL. The thought amuses me...