Carolyn

So once again a month has passed without my writing a post, even though I have thought about doing so dozens of times. I am not sure where this reluctance to share my life seeps from...but it is there, and real, and I have become so selfish about my personal experiences, wanting to keep all of it to myself that even when I start to share I stop and think nah, no reason to share all that. Still, I do love jotting things down, as it gives me a kick now and then to look at the early months of this lj or my old lj I shared with Nick (twisting_path) and well, just reminiscing about all the fun in the past.

The last month has been full of wondrous and amazing events, as well as some sad and frustrating ones. The good - sharing an experience with someone special we'd both been looking forward to for years and years... Done now! And I am so glad to have been a part of that. Meant so much. The bad - watching some friendships explode and disintegrate (my old crit group), though in the end, I believe where the cards have fallen is a good thing. I adore my Team Awesome, and believe we're all in a good place now. I certainly feel a lot less EEEK now, and have lost the feeling I'd had of not belonging. Friendships lost, but friendships strengthened, and I am glad of that.

So cryptic, Cee!

Not much else going on - my daughter and son are doing well, about to start into school again - Tiff called me today and we talked a good half hour during my lunch about how happy she is now in Orlando. She loves what she is studying, she loves her new Starbucks she has moved to, she loves her roomies (in a house and there is a dog, a darling Golden I got to meet last month), and life is just so HAPPY for her. She likes Orlando now that she is settled there, and knowing she can fly home cheaply and easily helps. Thank goodness for cheapo airfare to Orlando!

Work is going very well - I love working for my boss, love my little firm, I feel in control and settled and I just buzz happily away all day, every day. There is a lot of stress but for some reason I am handling it better than I did. Living alone is kinda weird but kinda nice too... I get home from work, feed the dogs, play with the dogs, cuddle the dogs. Maddox has become like glue on me during the evenings. I spend a lot of time with him curled up with me. Weekends are relaxing - I try to meet Suz at least once a week on weekends to write, and oh I have my Gingerman writing group - we meet Monday nights at The Gingerman, a cute little bar near my work. Am getting to know that crew better and better and just really adore them all. Plus, it is a huggy group. I like hugs. :)

I need to get a dog door put in but this will also entail a massive overhaul of the fence (i.e., electrifying it!) because Maddox is an escape artist and we very nearly lost him a few weeks ago while I was gone, but my neighbor saved him. Whew! He pulls planks off and wiggles through. So frustrating that I can't trust him in his own backyard. :(

Writing...have to say I was and am disappointed with how my last book has done. I have several ideas of why that is so, what contributed to it not doing well (while my other books DO continue to sell well), but such is the way of things, right? Not going to stress over it, it is what it is and hey what I have received in royalties definitely paid a bill that needed paying so that is good.

I've been working on my sci fi, expanding it - about ten scenes to go on that - and am falling hard for the brilliance of Scrivener as it is helping me sort out my fantasy mess, which I have needed to for about oh a decade, I suppose? More later on that, and on writing in general (I say that and then another month will go by, oops). The happy is I found, buried deep in my email, the outline I'd written ages and ages and I do mean more than 9 years ago for this fantasy story, and rereading it now, I can see clearly what will work and what needs to be changed. All in all though? I think it will be a go. It always makes me so happy to visit with these characters! I miss them!

All for now. It is bedtime - haven't been sleeping well since the weekend because dork me burned the roof of my mouth on too-hot pizza. The burns were pretty much agony - last night I finally was able to tolerate warm food. Horrifically painful. :(

This ended up longer than I thought. I do ramble!

Busy week! No, busy past two weeks! I shall make a list! But first up are three fics that I want to give some extra love to (as well as the peoples themselves)

0.0 First up is Nick's Merlin Big Bang story. This is where you can find it:

http://cyus.livejournal.com/28557.html

Edit the Sad Parts is not 'just' a fanfiction story. It delves deeply into the journey Merlin goes through in transitioning from a confused young girl who isn't sure about what direction to take, to finding himself, both personally and in life. It is an incredibly-moving story, told in Nick's wonderful way of writing. This was a long haul, writing this fic, and wasn't easy for him at times and took a lot of whip cracking (tee hee) but I absolutely love his end result. So proud of him! Yup I am.

0.1 Okay folks, original fiction always seems like the step-child on LJ and it makes me sad, as my friend amand_r writes a lot of original fiction, really wonderful stuff, and she doesn't get near the comments she deserves. I helped beta this one and it is a delightful first person story, gay fiction, and you should read it or else I will cry at you. AND COMMENT, PLEASE? Seriously! I love seeing my friends stretch their wings!!! So do it!

http://amand-r.livejournal.com/568288.html?view=10709984#t10709984


0.2 Also, SPN fans out there? I want you to read this too, as my dear blue_fjords has written a long and wonderful SPN crime novel that makes me extremely proud of her. It has been a tough year for her with losing her beloved puppy after some tough illnesses, and getting through a health scare of her dad's. ANY SPN fan should love this as she has great characterization. I started to read this story while she was writing it long before I ever watched SPN and this story is, in major part, why I decided to go ahead and watch the show already. That fandom is HUGE so breaking in is hard but she is getting there. I am proud of you, Blue!!!!

http://blue-fjords.livejournal.com/103072.html

OKAY NOW ON TO THE ME ME ALL ABOUT ME PART:

1. School -- going very well! I've been three weeks now, and I have come to grips with the Professor's style, and what he wants from class - primarily participation, both in class and with the online discussion questions. There will be two papers but am seriously not worried--it is not a 'memorize this' class, but a 'let's discuss our current readings' class. Sometimes I feel a bit dorky as there are some seriously-perceptive people in there, but so far, ahem, MY questions end up being discussed...I am simply far better expressing myself via writing than verbally. I actually talked to the prof about that after class Thursday, when he mentioned he enjoys how I write. Told him well, I am well-used to writing, it is the getting out verbally I am having a harder time with but the atmosphere (minus that one closed-mind bitch, yo) is very forgiving of silly questions. Whew!

I will make an A in that class, dammit! *shakes fist* In other words, I am so very, very glad to be back in school. I love it.

2. Writing -- manuscript turned in, though I am still fine-tuning bits. About to send my editor a bit of an addition to a scene she asked for. I have absolutely loved working with my editor this go round. She worked super-hard on this, and I did to. THAT is how it is supposed to be! We've both had our bad periods (literally) but I think we're doing well. It *did* take lots longer for this thing to get out than I wanted, but I know the extra work.

2.1 Writing -- I will be reworking a story into a manuscript for Loose-id, starting TODAY!!!! Okay I already started, but I am excited about making this into a publishable story. Once this is turned in, I will start a new story that Nick and I came up with when I was in Plymouth. But, also, I will be working on my STAGE story--that is the one that I have entered into the Fencon Workshop, which is the last weekend of the month. Lou Anders, Hugo award-winning editor, is the workshop leader and frankly? Some of the entries make me feel really sorry for the man. Hopefully, mine will pass muster and do well. I am ready for this story now.

3. Work - Hopefully, soon I will have some news on the FINALLY front. NOT at the unnamed law firm where I've been through March. This post is getting really long though and attention spans keel over fast, so I will wait to see what will happen then share the story. :) Just think of me on Monday at 9:00 A.M.!

And now to watch Project Runway - I hear there were near fist-fights! Woo!