Carolyn

And I miss Nick terribly. I mean, deep-down, completely missing him so bad I want to bite my pillow. I couldn't bear to look at that little flight thing on the airplane, couldn't bear to watch it go further and further away from where I want to be. I would start to tear up and want to scream that I couldn't hold him, be with him, right then. That so many miles separate us, miles that we ARE fortunate to be able to traverse, but just not often enough. Not often enough at all. It always sucks so bad after we've been together for awhile...but I am already planning to go to Germany sometime in the fall (if I can--not much vacation time left, so may LOL be January--brrr?). LOL can't afford to go to the UK again any time soon...but I'll be back. I want to see more shows! I want to see Billy Elliot, and whatever else!

The house is a wreck--there will be massive cleaning done on my day off, it looks like. And the a/c is messed up because the filter disintegrated, and I am too tired to run get another one tonight. And yeah, unreal, I come home from being chilled in London all the time (I also froze on the plane), wearing two sweaters and a jacket--hit Houston and oh my LORD, hello Heat and Sunshine!!!! UGH!!!! I went to a restroom and yanked most of that off (not all, did not want to get arrested) and felt better. After our long wet winter here, and then being in Wales and London, getting blasted by the muggy heat of Houston made me feel sick. Weird. Got home to a hot house--the son tried to turn the a/c on and didn't know how to do it, and with the filter needing replacement (guess I should've done that before I left, but it SNOWED the day before I left, so...) so he froze up the a/c.

I have TWO blisters. Right foot's pinky toe, left foot's somehow between big and next big toe. Weird. HURTS.

Maddox has been blowing his coat. He looks like crap and there is fur everywhere. I TOLD THEM BOTH to brush the hell out of him--when a Husky starts to blow its coat, it is pure hell, fur everywhere, he looks like he is molting as great clumps of fur loosen and eventually fall off. Bedraggled pup, and without a doubt he did indeed stop eating while I was gone. He looks like he's lost a good 4 lbs. ARGH. Mental! But there is fur on my bed, fur on the floor, fur on the walls probably, and not much fur on him, dammit. Oh Huskies! Fortunately the red and whites don't blow as crazily.

Shelby is outside. The daughter said, "She stayed out ALL THE TIME." She won't come in for the night either, so may end up sleeping out there tonight, the silly.

Also, the daughter failed to check the mail. Great. The mailbox is no doubt stuffed to the gills with mail. GREAT.

I'll make a post tomorrow, I guess, on some of the things we did, but frankly...not in the mood to share much. Sorry. There are some pictures though that I can share, and general impressions of London. So, tomorrow. I am cranky right now so don't want to right now.

I am, however, reading a fascinating book about (more or less about) writing. Might just share some bits and pieces I especially love...it's not a how-to-write type of book, but rather a this-is-how-I-write book. So much of what this particular writer throws out makes bells go off in my head, hell CHIMES go off in my head (WOW, he is like that? and WOW I am not completely weird after all!), and I'm finding a surge of excitement and inspiration, coupled with becoming rather entranced by a few ideas that burst out of being in London this week, that need addressing.

I am home, and I don't want to be here...think it will take a few days to get back into the swing of regular life.

It sucks to write a big post and have it fall apart. A redo:

1. Cardiff and London: We have airplane tickets, train tickets, we have tickets to see Priscilla Queen of the Desert for TWO shows, and The Little Dog Laughed in London. Four nights in Cardiff, four in London. Walking along a certain beach...good times to come. Not near long enough but this is how our lives have been, are, and will be.

2. Exams: Nick is in the midst of his oral exams. We see each other in less than a month but he has to get through these during these next few weeks. So, it is hard to be all excited WHEE LESS THAN A MONTH! when he has all this to get through. But...I can't help it.

3. Stress: My dentist noted I am really stressed (and it is causing me teeth-jaw problems). She is right. This month has been a little much to deal with...taxes, social security nightmare, my son wrecking my car, my daughter getting her car stuck on a curb (srsly, and I lost it and cried, I seriously just.am.sick.of.this.crap), illnesses, dental stuff, other stuff, bills, worrying over friends and family and boyfriends and and and AHH! Always something! I clench my teeth while asleep AND during the day, but have been trying valiantly to relax, to breathe deep when I realize I am doing it and relax (like now), and to try to focus not on the worries but on the good stuff. (It also helps Nick that I do this--poor guy, I've had so much craziness come up this month I've tried not to wail about it, but damn...what a month!).
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I guess that is it for now. I, in no way, said what I started out to say, which was something along the lines of how important it is to not stress about life and to not let it eat you up, how cutting back in areas of life so other areas of life can flourish is a good thing, how trusting oneself to learn new things can bring a different(and maybe unexpected) kind of happiness, how taking the time to relax and enjoy the quiet moments can open up unexpected thoughts. Good thoughts. Powerful thoughts, thoughts that are sorting themselves out about alot of things. I meant to say all those things, but didn't.

Or did I?

Today seemed like a good day to finally get around to sharing more about our adventures during our holiday. Hope y'all enjoy what is to come...we took a LOT of pictures, and the ones in this post and the ones following (I think it will take about 4 altogether) aren't all of them, but they are the best and hopefully you guys will enjoy seeing some of the sights and places we saw.

We loved Wales, so very much. We were both prepared to enjoy ourselves--of course!--and have great fun tromping around, maybe seeing some Torchwood shooting sites (and we did!) but we did not really anticipate coming away from our week there so enamored of this country, its people, its ways. But, we did.

It isn't so hard to put a finger on why either. And, it really wasn't focused on Cardiff either--rather on the charm of Wales, the amazing accessibility (despite, lol, those C roads we traveled--just wait until you see those!), the loveliness of the people. Every person we met was kind to us, helpful, quite willing to chat us up about this and that and John Barrowman too...we were both so comfortable there, never felt fear or worry or like we were over our heads.

If we didn't understand something, we could ask, and answers were always cheerfully given. Our hosts were absolutely wonderful to us, it was such a PLEASURE to be completely ourselves in this environment, no nosiness, no questions asked, just acceptance. That alone brings tears to my eyes. I mean it.

We will go back, as soon as possible. Hopefully end of April or something... Nick's uni schedule is the main consideration now, as he enters the really tough phase (finishing the thesis, final exams). Day after tomorrow I'll be back in Texas, and we'll be back to reality, but, with our new love for that country, and a promise to return firmly grasped, we can make it through (once again) until we see each other again. We, honestly, feel very fortunate to be able to do what we do, to have what we have. No tears here, just amazement on how awesome our lives truly are.

So, I shall shut up now as I am dangerously close to woobiness, and y'all don't need to see THAT do you? Please...click here and enjoy! I hope you do!

( follow our adventures with us, yay! )