paragraphs | I really, seriously, want to know

January 2023

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How the heck do all of you guys keep up with everything? What is the secret? Why can't I? I am behind EVERYWHERE...I want to read fics, I want to read TW3, I want to be active on my flist, on TWU, I want to play with socks, I want to finish my fic for

lgbtfest, I want to get to know people better, I want...

I want to know how come I can't seem to do any of this. WTH.

Very depressing is my life at times though given what is going on with some very special people on my flist, I have no right to complain. Not by a long shot.

So, I guess I'd just best shut up. I just wanted to whine a second. Wail.

C, being eaten alive by work and RL and tired of it

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You want to play with socks? Okie, dokie, then, I'll send you a pair. Washed of course.

Uh, snookum's you have a full plate with re-writes and a blooming writing career. That makes me happy...even if four years later, I'm STILL waiting for the autographed cover of ARTS. ::poke:: I don't fret that you haven't seen every little post I've made in my journal. You catch the important one's and that's what counts. But, whine if you must, it's good for what ails ya.

LOL yes, socks. Torchwood socks to be specific. Lots of fun going on with socks and I miss every bit of it. Sighs.

Oh oh you stop that. LOL. Although, you have given me an interesting idea regarding that. I will investigate!!!!

I basically can check LJ at night, but I can check email all the time at work, so if you post something, send me an email! Dude!

Idea? What? You're going to autograph a sock and send it to me? Course, I suppose you'll have to learn how to spin doggie hair yarn and knit one first. ::veg::

I have yet to figure out why you haven't taken me seriously about the autograph though. How long have I been asking now?
You know, like, totally forever.

LOL well, I have nothing to sign, yet! LOL.

Got your email. About to respond. cparagraphs@googlemail.com is my addy though I am on tatteredleaf also for yahoogroup stuff.

So here's what you do...

Put paper in printer. Print picture of cover. Sign. Mail. Pretty darn easy. I'm just sayin.

I blow off my job.

:D

J/K

It's a slow period at work right now. AND I have utterly failed at Big Bang. So I have to take both feet out of that one because the stress has been driving me BATS.

I have another challenge story due in a few weeks which is only mapped out in my noggin, but thankfully it doesn't have to be a novella. Whew!

I blow off my job.

That is the pain of this, I used to be able to! At least, I once found it easier. But now, I am constantly busy, and we bill our time hourly (I work for an engineering firm--we do all the GIS, mapping and research stuff for BNSF Railway and the KCS though only BNSF in my office), and it eats eats away at me. It has been slow lately, which is actually worse. When I am swamped with lots of map requests, I can far more easily charge time and thus relax and at LEAST read lj and TWU and such.

But just like for everyone else, times are leaner for the rr, and they've cut back. Fortunately, we just won a couple of new projects, one of which might involve me. Gawd I hope so--at least then the day goes fast.

Am working on my festfic right now...so far so good. For the first time in, oh, 4 years, I am actually going to post a fic.

We should all be allowed to whine and vent in our LJs!

Real life does kick our asses. Hope it clears up for you soon, my crazy friend!

It better! Let's not mention YOUR posts--I am behind on those, too. Hell I just remembered you sent me an email I haven't answered yet! OMG!!!! SEE?????? *wails*

Yup, just found it and responded to it. PROOF I AM LOSING THIS BATTLE!!!!

You know me ... I know you're out there, so I'm not too worried about you not responding to my LJ posts! *grin*

LOL, I am indeed. Always prowling about, waiting for the day you come back to town!!!!

I fly through Newark to go to Germany. Any tips on that airport? This is the first time I've had my layover in the States! (I am sure it will be much better than Heathrow! OY!)

What airline(s) are you flying?

Continental, with a four hour layover on the way back, thanks to a schedule change that I got a week or so ago. Boo hiss! LOL. On the way there, it is just an hour or two, no biggee.

Four hour layover in Newark on the way back?

Since you're on Continental, you shouldn't have any terminal issues. All of their international flights depart from Terminal C as far as I know, and all of their Texas flights come into Terminal C unless something odd is going on and then bump you to Terminal A where all the Continental Express flights come in ... then it's just an "airtrain" ride, without having to go out and back in through security.

Hey if there are plugs for my laptop, and coffee, I may be okay. I will be terribly whipped, unfortunately, but I just pace myself and try to take it easy. I have to go through customs there and that does take awhile, so maybe a long layover is a good thing.

Yeah, there are plugs and plenty of coffee shops, at least in the main terminal. Not sure about on the other side of customs.

I have decided that if I'm going to get this book done, I'm going to have to go on hiatus completely. Too many distractions.

I know, but I know like you for me having these connections helps keep one sane! Daughter coming home soon???? Oh dear, I just asked a question you must respond to, so here is another--is this another in your series, or something completely different? :)

I am not done with my rewriting on my fic with Loose-Id, either. Add that to my list...

psst! i don't actually get things done until the very last possible second, but i'm so busy flailing about like a big flaily thing that i don't notice

you just need to flail more!

flail more! Kel, I like this advice. Flail flail flail!!

Maybe though I need to make a schedule? (and why, now, do I 'think' that word Brit-style a la JB????)

o sure, schedules (you should always think words jb-style, it makes them naughty and fun)

Exactly.

I am working on formulating said schedule right now! Really!

Well, when I was keeping up on it all it's because that was very literally all I was doing - hiding in the internet! Now that I'm not hiding online, I hardly read any fic, I'm not reccing, I'm hardly at TWU and struggling to keep up with the RPG. And not writing at all!

So, uh. You do it by not having a life, and you pick and choose if you do? :D

sighs--I actually have lived the hidey-in-the-internet life myself...maybe I am longing for the good ol' days of that (though not the good ol' days themselves).

I am what, officially five weeks behind on my reading there? Soon soon...at least it'll be fun to read it in one go (though confusing as hell lolol).

I have absolutely no idea how to keep up with everything. Failure to do so happens on a regular basis.

Sigh, am starting to realize I am not alone. :*(

If it's any consolation, I don't know how people do it either. I think I'm operating above top capacity 90% of the time, which is why I'm so rubbish at certain areas of my life.

Either that, or you're perceiving competence that isn't there because you're seeing the efforts of the GROUP rather than the individual, and trying to pick up everything in the exchange.

Also, mmm. Tea.

Well, I probably AM perceiving competence perhaps...but heck, you *are* one of the ones I am in awe of, so... LOL.

I saw your list. I need a list.

(and now Sang is determined to get me into knitting, sending me links of temptation...lol)

I have learned more about multi-tasking these past months than I ever thought possible. Setting search programs to run and then pulling up a window to check messages. Downloading fics to read on trains and planes, printing them out to take to the treadmill at the gym. Snatching an hour here and there to check the flist, and doing about one in ten follow-up comments and posts.

Still learning how to pick and choose, look for what feeds my writing (selfishly), try to find writers I want to talk to in a little more depth, keep up the dialogue in something besides a half-assed way. So I get how you feel constantly behind. There aren't any standards for participation besides "whatever you can manage," but you can still feel as though you can never do ENOUGH.

And RL is important, and has that nasty trick of sneaking up to buttkick when we least expect, and and. It's good to deliver up a personal howl to the cyberwinds now and then! OW-WOOOO!

Edited Date: 2009-04-25 03:07 pm (UTC)

I wish so badly I could take a train to work and back. My commute is roughly 45 a day twice a day, and that so eats into life. I am starting to resent this fact actually. I need to move closer to work, really, but don't like so much the part of town work is in...no character and, NO BOOKSTORE!!!! So I can't do it. No no no.

OW-WOOO!!!! From me too!

I know one of my major problems is getting overwhelmed (hence posts like this one). Know what I ended up doing? Instead of choosing one thing to do, at least that one thing, I turned everything off and went to bed.

I *have* been better this morning...frankly am glad I whined as all these comments have been very sweet to read. And, I do have 3500 words of my lgbtfest fic I really like (even though I failed to complete it in time to get to the person I asked to beta it, oh well...), and will get more writing time in tonight.

So that's what I need--that multi-tasking ability (something I frankly, honestly, lack...which extends to every aspect of my life, work included). Am just too damn project-oriented. I just have too many projects! LOL.

OW-WOOOO!!!!!

C!!

I know I have kind of dropped off the planet lately, and I really don't know why. But I'm trying to get back into it, and that means actually replying to people's posts.

Obviously, I haven't been keeping on top of everything lately, but I did it for a long time while I was in school. And I think the answer to your question is: caffeine and OCD. That's how I did it, for four years. I think I'm still recovering, though, so it's probably a good thing you don't.

*hugs* I've missed you!

OMG You aren't a Texan anymore, I just found out from Immora the other day! I am frankly glad you aren't--lol--because I knew it just wasn't panning out as you'd hoped. Ah well, all experience is good experience.

So, what you up to???? Welcome back to the real world (such that online life is, huh!)

Most of these people don't have kids. This is my theory on how they do so much. Also, I found I got more Internet stuff done when I gave up TV. And commuting, you do that, right? That's a major time-suck. Do you write in your head while commuting? I used to write in my head (not *just* a euphemism for fantasizing hot boy-on-boy action scenes) while I walked to and from the playground, and stood about watching the girl play on swings and in mud and such.

Wail away, though -- it helps. It's a series of tough choices, when you have so many things in your life that you find to be fun and fulfilling that there isn't time for them all. On the plus side, though, if you're that kind of person, you're going to find joy all over the place.

Kids, and the awful commute. When I first started working for the railroad, they were downtown, only 15 minutes away. Heaven! Then they moved further out--30 minutes--and I got the job with Bartlett & West (was a contractor at BNSF which allowed me to work 9-4, perfect for the kids)...and that was out there too. And then we moved to the railroad campus. And of course, I-35...is hell. Argh!

Yeah, I have done all sorts of things to entertain myself on teh drive--from studying German (until I got frustrated with the lack of written material to back up what I was learning) and listening to the radio, listening to books, etc. I also talk to Nick in the evenings on the way home, though lately he's been crashing earlier...boo hiss. LOL.

I am just so tired of the long commute for how it eats into life. Nothing I can do about it, except find a different job and no way.

I do find it helpful to fantasize about scenes I am about to write--it is almost essential. Gotta know where I am going. That's how I have the entire lgbtfest fic 'written' already, adn work out a lot of problems. In the shower too.

I do have to make choices every night--only so much time in the evenings, and i go to bed around 11. I am slowly trying to get into a regular routine now that N is usually in bed before I get home. That *IS* helping, but I have had to work through a very difficult period fo actually getting used to being alone in the evenings! Oy! I did not like it, at all!!! Still don't, but I am I think working through that okay now. Pretty much. Talking to friends (smile) sure helps in the evenings... :)

I guess I am getting there, slowly. If only I had a maid though...sure would be nice! LOL.

I don't know how to keep up with anything! D: I'm so far behind. Ugh ugh.

I know you and I are alot alike in this respect--too many things we want to do!!!! Argh. Narrowing the focus is helpful, I know, but...trying to work just on my loose-id stuff leaves me...lonely. So, at least with writing, am trying to create a balance between the two. Doesn't seem to work yet but I am going to do it, I swear, once this fest fic is done. NO MORE FESTING! I always regret it when I do these things!!!

Haha, we really sound alike when it comes to fests and things. Right now I'm just banging my head against the computer and going 'WHY DID I SIGN UP FOR BBB? WHY?' But, if I can write 5,000 words tomorrow I'll have the rough draft done and then I have a month to make it better and can get back to writing steampunk and studying for the GRE, like I NEED to be doing.

And I have such issues focusing. I don't even know where to start there.

LOL you did that too? OMG, so many have. I know better to devote so much to a big wordcount requirement--it would just take over life. Grin.

I always say I will never do another, and then, dammit, Nick comes along and grins at me, and then...ah! Argh.

Well, I was writing the fic anyway, albeit slowly. I had already decided it would probably be about 30,000 words long, so this was just my excuse to make myself finish it and maybe get art for it out of the deal. I forgot though, that life tends to get jealous when I make plans for other things and rear its ugly head.

A grinning Nick really is a force of nature to contend with. WHY DO BOYS MAKE IT SO HARD TO SAY NO?

You met him! You saw him prance cutely, and flash those big brown eyes! And there is no stopping that! Argh! LOL.

Okay cool on the fic--so, this is a good thing, then. I'll be interested this time in BBB because this time around I actually know a bunch of those doing it. I'll be looking for yours, without doubt.

Hard to believe its been a year since Nick and I visited!!! Maybe that is why he dreamed of roller coasters last night?

These last weeks, I haven't been able to keep up with anything. I don't work enough, I haven't written a creative piece in ages, and I fail at reading my CW books. Let's not even talk about my word count. *sighs*

But then, I knew it would be like that, as I'm away from home so much in April and Mai, too.

I've cut down my comment time in the fests and told myself that I don't have to feel guilty about it. Meh...

What always helps me to get back on track is to see how all the various activities serve one goal. When I start flailing, I know that I need to re-focus so that I don't get lost. And I've come to the conclusion that it's no good beating myself up about my days of slacking. Sometimes though, it takes some time to get from realisation to execution. *g*

*hugs*

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Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass. ~

I really, seriously, want to know

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