Carolyn

In your own space, post a rec for at least three fanworks that you have created. It can be your favorite fanworks that you've created, or fanworks you feel no one ever saw, or fanworks you say would define you as a creator.

I ran across this on pir8fancier's lj, and I thought omg, I wrote a couple of HP fanfics ages ago! Many many ages ago. Then I realized...I don't have any copies anymore! So I decided to hunt them down, and get them onto AO3 in case someday I ever want to read them again, or something.

It took a bit of hunting, but I finally found them! I can count on 2 hands the number of fanfics I've ever written (at least before the two fests I did this past year to challenge myself re writing short) - but these two I enjoyed writing very much. So here they are and saved forever now on AO3. Will get the others I found (a Torchwood fic, a Being Human fic) up on AO3 too.

Haven - a Harry/Draco fic. Draco Malfoy has been tried and convicted for his war crimes; only the question of his punishment remains.

and

Roots - a Neville Longbottom fic. After Gran's death, Neville uncovers a mystery surrounding his parents' past.

Both of these were written in 2007, so before all the books had come out. I recently rewatched all the Harry Potter movies and it made me miss all the HP fun (at least the little that I was involved in). I'm not currently in a fandom and rereading these have made me all nostalgic for the funtimes.

The third fic for this challenge though is a fanfic that touched me deeply, because it was written about two men who were real life lovers, the composer Benjamin Britten and tenor Peter Pears. Both are long gone now, but they left behind letters, beautiful, touching letters of their love for each other (not to mention the music Britten wrote for Pears). When I got them for Yuletide 2009, I was quickly swept up into their world and those letters - the content and the writing style - and absolutely adored bringing them to fictional life.

Piano e forte - Reunited in London in the late 1940's after more than a month apart, Ben has a special Christmas surprise for Peter.

I love this story, so very much! Someday I would love to write a bigger story about them, or based on them!

Somehow, crazily, I ended up with THREE Yuletide gifts. WTH!! I am not sure what happened there, but I am not complaining. I've read two already, with the longest one left. All three are Whitechapel, a BBC mini-series with two installments that amand_r hooked me up with. So, so loved that show. If you haven't caught it, please do. It is lots of fun, pulling old crimes into the present (Jack the Ripper first, then the skeevy Kray Twins. Eeww, creepy). Brilliant casting, wonderful dynamics, nail-bitey drama...it has it all.

Yesterday was such a lovely day. It was all me and the kids, no one else--though the psycho SIL and my MIL made a very (VERY) brief appearance. Man oh man, my poor MIL, dealing with Mary is getting really hard. Mary needs help, badly, but refuses (screaming-match, call the police kind) and I fear MIL may be forced to go to court to force help on her. Oh man. But MIL gave me a lovely silver bracelet that I'm wearing now--been awhile since I've had anything on that wrist. Feels cool.

The kids went above and beyond awesome. This Christmas (like last) we all just got one thing. Tiff got the brown boots she wanted (they are 200 dollar boots and I got them for 89! GO ME! yay for timely mark-downs!) and son wanted a nice external hard drive. Got him a 2 terrabyte, massive Seadisc thing--again, a heck of a deal, marked down, and stupendous. Then Santa got them CHRISTMAS PJ'S, BLUE!, and chocolate, and odds and ends.

The kids in turn got me a Kindle. A KINDLE! I HAZ ONE! I am so excited about this! I jumped up and down I was so excited. No, I have not succumbed to the 'I will never buy a real book again!' world, but oh man, this is going to be so fantastic for many reasons. I can put my fanfics I want to read on there! AUDIOBOOKS WTH no one EVER told me that you can listen to audiobooks on this thing!!! I LOVE AUDIOBOOKS! Have the first few of the Harry Dresden books to listen to--whee! I think I'll like listening to James Marsters.

Such a fantastic Christmas. We went to see TRON, the three of us, and oh that was nice and fun and I loved it. 3D! My first since all the new 3D's came out and I like it. Want more. LOL.

Then we went to eat dinner at my friend Leigh Ann's house--her mom likes to cook for lots of people and their family is small so every year (except last year--ice and illness killed it) she's cooked like a madwoman, and invited friends and family over. I love that. Plus, they provide great wines. I approve.

The only thing marring Christmas is my knee. It has gotten progressively worse since last Sunday's post-bowling soreness, and yesterday, I did a little happy jump when my son opened up a present from his grandmother (a gorgeous ring I was frankly scared she wouldn't give him in time--that she would die, and her evil other children would get hold of). I came down funny and twisted my knee, ouch ouch ouch!!!! I couldn't walk on it at first--I could by the time we went to the movie but I was like an ol' gimpy thing. It is a bit scary--I have insurance through the end of the week, so I am going to the doc's tomorrow. I hope he just splints it up fancy (I bought a knee-type Ace bandage with support and that has helped tremendously) and that time and patience will heal things. Hopefully by Thursday I will be much better, when my sister comes with Lexie her daughter for a visit.

I woke up angry at that rat bastard who is ruining my old company, but then started to think of the new lease on life, the new freedom...and new opportunities. It's going to be okay, I am sure of it. I did hear from my editor last week, and that sure put the shiny on the writing stuff, so a going to stay positive that it will all work out, and that leaving B&W will be the best thing that could've happened. It sucks to be forced out, but I'd lost my love for the place already. Time to go forward.

Today is Day 24 of Nano. My stats are as such:

Nano words: 36,043
Total wordcount: 71,657
Nano thinks I won't hit 50k until December 3rd. Hmph! Not true!
Plotpoints yet to write: 12
Estimated final wordcount: 90kish, a little higher than I had thought, but still under 100k, which is good for me considering last two novels were over 250k... :)

This is the first year of ALL the many years I've stabbed at Nano that I will actually get 50k. I am pretty floored about this. There's alot of differences w/me this go round that I think have made a difference: I have a project that I love, I have alot of reasons to get this thing done NOW, I have a local support group that is always asking 'how you doing?' (and incidentally? all of them have already reached 50k and beyond. Woot!). I have also had minimal hand/arm pain. That stopped me cold last year. But not this year. I do not know why but I am not questioning it.

Am at work today but not really working hard. There are four of us here today, as was yesterday and Monday. Not much else to say about this place.

Thanksgiving for us will be quick and easy. Spinach quiche, orange juice, croissants, jelly, bacon. 10-11:30, then MIL is out of there for other festivities with her friends, the daughter is off to work, the son has been invited to go eat dinner at a couple of different places so he is headed out. And I will stay at home with my pupsters, writing. Thanksgiving isn't a big affair in our house obviously.

Tonight though? HARRY POTTER! With mah kids! Plus two! Plus probably a couple more! Whenever I go see a movie 'with my kids' it usually means about six kids. No, not complaining. Much. LOL. Tiff was bad and saw it on Monday--she tried to sneak-watch it and wasn't going to tell but guess what? I woke up, realized she wasn't home (yes she is 21, but she always touches base with me, we just do that), so I texted her. CAUGHT! She had just got out of the theatre, bad girl. LOL. Oh well.

Busy days--Nick and Tiff both are in the throes of job hunting, so I am getting hit from both sides. Grin. I continue with my SPN rewatch, and am going to start watching Buffy as I have never seen it. It never appealed to me back then, but maybe now?

Not much else. I am so happy with how things are going writerly-wise, that that is really my main focus in life right now. Then once this is done, I'm diving straight into Yuletide. I really really like the fandom I have chosen from my recipient's list; I will be writing something I never have before, and that will be fun.

After that? I am challenging myself to a three-months, start-to-finish manuscript writing marathon. I want to get the next one to Loose-Id as quickly as I can. This one will have alot of fun built-in, and I can't wait to work on it. WHEE!

I guess I should get to work?

So, this has been an interesting week. Seven days ago, I finally gave in to my doctor's suggestion and said okay, dammit, I'll try it, I'll try your damn Wellbutrin. I've had 8 doses now and I have to admit, every day has been better than the previous. Tuesday was brilliant followed by a not-so-brilliant Wednesday, but yesterday and today were good. My mind is calming, I'm able to find and keep (at least for a little) that inner peace that has been so damn elusive in my mind. I'm getting things done as a result, and man, that is a huge relief. I really hate being miserable.

I've long struggled with focus, long found it next-to-impossible to actually just sit, by myself, at my computer and relax, keep the evil thoughts at bay, and sink myself into writing. Oddly, I have no problem when it comes to work. Just my own writing (which is very sad isn't it?) I've tried everything short of drugs--heck my boyfriend is a psychologist, he has taught me tons of techniques to help (and they have indeed helped) but man, sometimes it is impossible to keep the edgy, teary-eyed, over-reactive, depressed and blue fractured constantly-on-the-verge-of-tears thoughts at bay by sheer force and will. Sucks, really sucks. Sigh. So I gave in, got the damned drugs, and am hoping that things continue to get better. I hope so, I hope so.

Nano is this month as all know and despite a few days of crises (that led up to calling the doc) I am doing very very well with Nano, for the first time ever. I'm hitting the halfway mark today, which thrills me to pieces. Yeah yeah I am way behind but I am doing Nano not to write a 50k book from word 1 to word 50,000, but to finish this ms that I started two years ago--two freaking years ago. Right now I am around 62k, with a goal of 80k. I have about 6-7 scenes to go until it is done. I rewrite as I go, but it will need a clean-up rewrite, and I also need to make sure all my characterizations are in-line (especially after stringing the characters along for two freaking years).

I love the optimism I feel right now, this second, this peace that comes with knowing I can do this. AM doing this. Given this will be the first manuscript I've completed in almost FIVE years? Yeah. This is big. I'm going to be able to turn this puppy in sometime in December, which leaves me ecstatic beyond words. Hopefully will make my editor ecstatic, too... It better! More like she will probably faint.

Next ms for Loose-Id, my goal is to write it, start to finish, in three months. I know I can do this if my stupid mind lets me and I don't succumb to the mess that my brain has been for so long.

After that, the rest of 2011 will be devoted to the fantasy.

Other things--I've now watched all the episodes of Supernatural, and while I am glad I waited until now to do this, it is kinda sad I didn't enjoy the show all these years. Oh well! I have now, and I especially love Dean. By rights I should be really annoyed with him--he is an awful lot like alot of guys I've known and heck, he's a Texas boy to boot, so...yeah. But, really have enjoyed watching the show lots, sharing the fun with Nick and with Blue aka blue_fjords. Dean's characteristics have kinda snuck into my current ms, the Lee character...LOL. I can't see this as a bad thing, except the rewrite will be more complicated as a result. Darn you Dean Winchester! Why are you so perfect???

I am baking bread tomorrow! I'm using a recipe of spiderine's that involves beer and two kinds of flour and lots of dough-smacking. Should be fun. I am not budging from the house the rest of the weekend, and am excited about making bread. LOL!

YULETIDE--yes, I changed mine at the last minute, I did. I like looking at the last minute to see what needs offers, and try to pick those I believe would be great fun. I also added a request--Day of the Triffids! I must remember to tell misswinterhill as she is the person who convinced me to read the book. I love post-apocalyptic novels for some reason, and this one is just fantastic. The movie was dorky. I think they are remaking it, actually. WAIT! THE BBC DID A TWO PART MINI-SERIES in 2009!!! I must find it!!!!!

NICK IS CALLING ME!!!

LOL okay we talked a long time. Man that was nice, usually he goes to sleep well, well before 8 p.m. my time. We both miss (terribly!) the days he could stay up into the wee hours and get up late, making our up-times match more closely (oh the fun of long-distance partnerships, huh) but...real life and jobs have put an end to that. Funny thing though is now I am not used to him staying up so late so I had to fuss at him to GO TO BED so I could write. :) Sorry baby...LOL!!

What else? Daughter's interview for Teach for America is in a couple of weeks--things look very good for her to get a position. Where though? We don't know--Somewhere, USA. My sister and I vote for Nashville (cuz my sister is there, yeah?).

No other plans for the weekend--just play with my puppies, talk with Nick, write, bake bread, write more, laundry, write, write, write. And write some more.

And, most importantly, stay happy. That'd sure be nice.

Yuletide is posted, and I am extraordinarily thrilled with this piece. I can't wait to share it. It's in my beloved first person, is just the most favorite kind of writing for me (sigh, I am such a romantic), is based on two real men who were lovers in real life, which made researching their lives absolutely fascinating. Just--I can't wait to talk about them more. I fear I will bore you! But too damn bad. LOL. (SO looking forward to 'meeting' my recipient! She's not on LJ, just on Dreamwidth, so but for this our paths would never have crossed. I believe she is a Brit--not positive though).

I'm working on my reel_torchwood piece right now and it is nearly finished...I am a picky git though and I am not entirely satisfied with its smoothness. It's truly the first thing I've written in so long, that the start is just rocky and cranky and I for one can tell when I started to get the groove back. So I'm trying to smooth out those first 5-6 pages and hope to get that done tonight before bedtime (11). I have two hours!

LOL I thought I'd posted this...got distracted. So, changing the time and sending this up, then back to work on my Gulls. :)

Also? So go read this amazing story I haven't even finished yet but DAMN sanginmychains is ON on this one, in so many ways. POW!: http://sanginmychains.livejournal.com/13298.html#cutid1

My first draft of my reel_torchwood fic, The Gulls (aka The Birds lol) is DONE! Nope, it is not ready to turn in (about to go beg Alba for one more day to polish it) but I am really quite happy with how it has turned out. This is my first serious attempt at writing Torchwood fanfiction, and somehow throughout the process I lost my deeply-rooted fear of fandom failure.

I also have discovered something through writing this--that I enjoy writing action, and bird attacks aka somewhat horror, I suppose. Thriller-horror. LOL. I don't know enough about writing such scenes (action, thriller, violence) and know my attempts can be improved upon, so I would like to sink my teeth (somehow) into exploring this new-found interest further.

Not sure how to go about that yet, but one of my original fiction projects for next year will be along this line, and I am very excited about learning more about wielding words scarily. Dramatic pacing, fear-spawning dialogue, unsettling settings, frightening atmosphere--all those things that go into making a fic creepy-crawly.

I don't presume to have the talent in me to write truly frightening fics--the only story I've EVER read that truly scared me was THE SHINING--but I want to study the techniques, see how far I can go with it. Should be fun, in any case! (I had a disturbingly good time writing the bits in The Gulls where the seagulls attacked, and building up the suspense...at least, I think I built it up... See? lots to learn.)

getyourwordsout signups are up! I started out with it last year but really, my writing mojo would only come out now and then, so I ended up dropping out. I also had too-high of a goal. THIS year, I have chosen 200k multi-projects. Still alot of words, but writing The Gulls has helped me recapture that element of fun in writing that had gone missing (for five years), and also, most importantly, has helped me recapture that peace one must have with being alone in a quiet room in order to write. Twitter has also helped that. Having friends a fingerstroke away has helped alot. Strange but true.

YAWN! I must get up and make breakfast, perhaps some coffee, and get to work on these edits. I know me--its going to take me all day to do them, and I know I will be taking a break this afternoon to go get a Christmas tree. I put our old fake one on the curb and someone took it. Good! It was prelit, and the lights didn't work anymore, it smelled musty from the garage and frankly, I just didn't want it anymore. So, we're getting a real one today. A nice little one.

I flipped through that horrid, embarrassing, unbelievable Save Ianto manifesto this morning. Stark raving mad, people. Stark raving mad. *shudders* So much better were the pony people and the monies they raised, and those who gave to Children in Need, etc. But this? Shudder. Embarrassing as hell to those of us who are TW fans and don't agree with their cause (or, agree with the cause, but not the way they went about it). Flipping through it, I was aghast and horrified that so many thought that it was a good thing, that it would somehow bring back their character. Instead, I can just imagine the hilarity the 436 pages of...of...WTH? this will provide. I feel for those who had their quotes, charities (the pony people) etc. put in there as part of it, without their permission. You Just Don't Do That, people... OY!!!

Okay time to get cracking! Need to finish this, because up next is my Yuletide fic and no I haven't started it yet. I know what I'm doing though, never fear. I have a week, and no obligations, so it should be all good. LOL.

C who has a headache